I’ve just posted a new page that offers my two cents worth on the good and bad of on-line discussion forums. If anyone knows of additional, and relevant, forums I’ve missed, please let me know and I’ll get them added to the list.
I’ve mentioned before that Thai boys read your lips as an aid in understanding English, and this is why they often have difficulty communicating by phone. Recently I discovered it goes WAY beyond that!
The other night I was out drinking with a group of Thai boys, at the Banana Bar in Soi Twilight. One of the boys had fixated on a Thai soap opera that was airing on the TV inside the bar. Apparently there was some comedy in this show, as he would occasionally bust out laughing. I said to him, “How can you watch the TV when the sound is turned down and the music is playing?” He was so entrenched in the show I didn’t get a response, but one of the other boys said, “We can read lips.” I asked, “All Thai can do this?” And all the boys chimed in with a very confident YES!
One boy told me Thais can talk like this, as he demonstrated by moving his lips without making a sound, and understand each other perfectly. I asked, “Mai means 5 different things, depending on how you say it, so how can Thais understand words like this?” He explained it’s not a problem, because they take it in context of what else is being said.
Amazing!
Here’s another example of how ignorant people can be while talking to boys on-line. A couple of the boys were chatting with farang on Gay Romeo the other night when one of them exclaimed, “Fuck around…NO!” And then the two started chattering vigorously with each other in Thai. So I asked them what the heck was going on, and one told me the man asked if he wanted to fuck around. I gave him a questioning look, and he said, “I not go fucking many place!”
After I stopped laughing the boys got an explanation as to what this guy was really trying to say. From what I observed, the farang had already been rejected. I don’t know what the boy did after learning what fuck around actually means. In any case, it’s a good example of how quickly communication can break down if you don’t keep it simple.
While doing some research for a previous post, I came across these three documents and added them to the Interesting Reads page.
Linguistic Perspectives of Thai Culture
“Culture is a complex phenomenon, a sum total of behavior and belief of a society. This paper is an attempt to offer a partial description of the culture of “khon thai” or Thai people as reflected in the Thai language.”
Communication Across Cultures
A lot of interesting stuff, including a discussion on how difficult it is for westerners to understand Kreng Jai
Kreng Jai
A great piece attempting to explain Kreng Jai and why it is different than just simple polite consideration.
The other evening I was having a conversation with a bar boy when he brought up a mutual farang acquaintance of ours. He was giving me reasons for why he didn’t like the farang, among them this guy had apparently slapped him around a bit. I should point out this farang was more to the boy than just a customer. The boy had affections for him and was hoping for a relationship.
As the discussion progressed, the boy said this farang has an easy heart. I thought it odd, given the nature of the conversation so far, and asked what he meant by this, as “easy heart” sounded like a good thing. Typical when talking to a boy with limited English skills, it took several attempts before I had something to go on. In the end, all I got out of him for an explanation was, “He not good to boys.” From that I gathered this boy is not the only one that’s had a bad experience with the farang.
I wanted to learn more about this “easy heart” thing, and went to the Internet in search of a definition. What I found was it generally means a person that is capricious or easily persuaded. Of course, this did not align with the context of its use in the conversation I had. So I took it to a different boy that knows the farang, but not the other boy. I asked him what the boy meant when he said this about the farang. He smiled and said, “Same same butterfly, but more bad.” Now butterfly is pretty darn bad. It means someone that is a sex crazed animal and will fuck anything that moves.
Come to find out, in this context, a person with an “easy heart” has the same butterfly behavioral patterns, in that he hops from one boy to the next, but he also breaks their hearts in the process. What the boy told me was the man’s heart is easy to fall in love and just as easy to fall out of love. In other words, he captures the boys’ hearts to get what he wants, and then dumps them.
The obvious conclusion one can draw from this is having a reputation with the boys for possessing an easy heart is not in your best interest. Over time, none of the boys will respect you, and you can forget about getting any free sex.
I try to avoid talking about the negative things in Thailand. Like any country, there are always a few things that really get to us outsiders…its a given. But just this once I’ll break form and talk about one that bugs me no end. It’s those damned security guards and their blasted whistles….tooooot toot toot toot toot toot toot - tooooot toot toot toot toot toot …
In America, a traffic cop only has to blow his whistle once to get drivers’ attention, but not in Thailand. They go on and on with that same series of one long and several short toots. It’s enough to drive a sane man crazy!
Just about every commercial building has one or more of these security guards out at the street assisting cars entering and exiting the parking garage. Every one of them playing the same gawd awful annoying series of whistle toots. And heaven help you if you’re passing buy just as the guard decides to start blowing his whistle right in your ear. They don’t care, and nobody else seems to either.
Yesterday I witnessed the ultimate in absurdity. Three of these guys all lined up directing the same cars, and you guessed it, blowing their whistles in unison. Like the drivers need three of these guys to get out of a parking lot and merge with traffic. I just wanted to scream at the top of my lungs.
Someone once told me there is good reason why they all do this. Apparently these guys get paid quite well, by Thai standards - about 10 to 12 thousand baht a month. Each wants to look like he’s earning his keep and what better way to do that than continuously blow their whistle. Far fetched as it sounds, I actually believe there is some truth in that.
I know there’s nothing I, or anyone, can do about it. This is one of those things where you just have grit your teeth, smile, and move on without complaining. But I do feel a little bit better, now that I’ve gotten it off my chest.
I can’t help but wonder though, what happens when a Thai drives a car in America. Will he ignore the insignificant single whistle toot of a traffic cop?
I’ve just added a new page that covers a bunch of things about room security and safety, both for those living here or staying in temporary accommodations. It also covers things I’ve learned about protecting yourself from theft while a boy is in your room. I hope you discover one or two items of interest.
I’m not trying to spoil anyone’s fantasy, but all the smiles, giggles, and amorous treatment the money boys give farang is a bit deceiving. In reality, most money boys assume you are a piece of shit until you demonstrate otherwise. It is not outwardly visible, but I can assure you they are closely observing everything you say and do. And your actions speak volumes louder than words.
The need to earn the respect and admiration of a prostitute may seem like an odd concept, but how well you are treated, by the boy and his friends, is dependant solely on you proving you’re not just another shit farang. Those that look at these boys as a commodity, to be purchased, used and discarded are missing out on more than they could possibly imagine. The difference is like night and day.
The latest page is a bit of a brain dump on the subject of umbrellas. Of everything covered on this new page, the most important is that umbrellas in Thailand are disposable. Leave your Aspinal of London, Gucci, Burberry, Knirps, or James Smith and Sons back home and bring a couple of cheap umbrellas instead.
I’ll add this to the next Thai/English Page update, but feel compelled to give it special attention now. Its one of those wonderful little discoveries I live for each day.
Up until last night, the only way I knew how to communicate “lie” or “not honest” was “not true” or “not talk true”. It’s what most boys understand. That was until I asked a boy about his nice looking watch. As he was showing it to me the boy explained a farang had recently given it to him, just before returning to his country. He went on to say the man claimed he paid 7000B for it, followed by, “I think he Pinocchio.” I said with surprise, “How you know this word?!” He said, “Yes, same bull shit.” I laughed and ask if this is something all the boys say, and he told me it was. So I asked a few more boys, and sure enough, they all knew it.
So there you have it – He Pinocchio means he’s not telling the truth. Isn’t that a hoot?
