Any Comments?
October 28th, 2007
As mentioned on my about page, I’ve had issues with leaving comments turned on for all posts. I started this page as an alternative, but since then decided to turn comments on for any new posts. I’m going to go ahead and leave this page up, because I don’t want to delete any of the existing comments. I also think this page still has value for any comments not specific to a particular post.
October 28th, 2007 at 1:35 pm
Welcome back!
I missed your blog when you took it offline earlier in the year. I enjoy reading it - it keeps me in touch with a place I love.
Glad to have you back!
Jake
October 28th, 2007 at 3:35 pm
Thanks for putting your site back online. I was sad when it went offline. I am hoping to go to Thailand within a year and your site has so much good info. I have learned a lot about what to expect. Love the pics too! I epecially enjoy the pics of everyday guys, although the model pics are also enjoyed.
October 28th, 2007 at 6:24 pm
Thank you for the excellent Thai Words. It’s quite well done.
And thank you also for this comment page. Conversations are always more charming than monologues.
November 2nd, 2007 at 5:27 am
Excellent website. I’m going to head to Thailand in December and all this information really helps. Have you ever been to Koh Tao? I’ll be heading there after a few days in Bangkok.
November 2nd, 2007 at 5:41 am
I’ve not been to Koh Tao, but hear its beautiful. Planning on doing some rock climbing?
November 2nd, 2007 at 8:21 am
They have rock climbing there? Ah nice, I had scuba diving on my list but I didn’t know about rock climbing. I’ve been trying to do research on the web but most of what I get is Koh Samui. That’s one more thing that I know. Thanks
November 2nd, 2007 at 6:56 pm
I think I read someplace they have rock climbing, but I may have it confused with another island. There are so many of them down there.
November 3rd, 2007 at 7:05 pm
I enjoy your blog very much. Thanks for the info on Thai discos/clubs. Maybe I will get a chance to visit one. I will be attending FAT Festival #7 next weekend and I expect to see tons of cute college type boys there.
November 5th, 2007 at 12:47 am
hi! i really enjoy your blog and i find thai culture to be very intereting. from your blog, i see that you like drag, so i have a suggestion. look up pictures of the japanese bands dir en grey and malice mizer. they are both visual kei (en drag) bands and in my opinion, very beautiful. keep up the good work!
November 22nd, 2007 at 3:43 pm
Very good entry on Thai skin. All the pictures of Thai boys always differed a lot in the tone of skin, and since I have never been to Thailand, I always wondered if it was just the setting, camera, etc. that caused them to look so different. Glad to know what to expect. I prefer the light skinned ones, so now I know I need to look north…lol.
This blog is very informative. Thanks again for your time.
November 28th, 2007 at 9:12 am
Just read your article about Rama V and wanted to let you know that it was Rama IV (Chulalongkorn’s father) who was the King in “King and I”.
Love the website though. Keep up the great work.
November 28th, 2007 at 8:11 pm
Thanks Yatyisam for that correction.
December 7th, 2007 at 9:24 am
Your blog is great. I had shelved my dream of going to Thailand but after a few minutes of reading your blog I want to start planning a trip.
December 7th, 2007 at 7:07 pm
Hi again, I read your information on getting a haircut and it was very helpful but I was wondering if you tried the Cutey and Beauty place? I don’t know any Thai so I would really like a place that speaks English.
December 7th, 2007 at 7:24 pm
Collin,
Your comment reminds me I need to completely rewrite that page. I’ve never used Cutey and Beauty but have heard they are good. Don’t worry about speaking English. When you go to any shop, take a picture of you to show them how you want your hair to look.
December 10th, 2007 at 4:51 pm
Thank You, Thank You, Thank You,
I have met someone on line. I am trying to learn about Thai culture and customs. I enjoy all that ou have done on you site to pass along helpful information. I also enjoy some phrases and words I discover along the way. I will possibly plan a tip next year sometime. I keep reading. Keep up the great work.
December 14th, 2007 at 8:03 am
It’s interesting because the Spanish word for butterfly is “Mariposa” and like Thai culture, to be called that is equally derogative; it’s tantamount to be called ‘faggot’ here in the states. Strange, considering what a beautiful and enigmatic insect the butterfly is.
January 3rd, 2008 at 9:51 pm
Thank you, I have enjoyed your webpage very much!
I thought you might be interested to know that the “U eat yet?” also seems to be a custom in Phillipines. I have made an online friend in Phils, and he/she (beautiful tranny) often asks me if I have ate. I say, “Yes, thank you” now because of your websites info.
Thanks again! Keep on writing…and umm…take me with you to Bangkok! hahaha!
January 7th, 2008 at 8:06 pm
Yes, I can concur that the ‘pom bpai gin khao kap’
i go eat… works perfectly. I have been using this in every kind of situation.. i first discovered it about 2 years ago when I was visiting the Gogo bars in the soi off Surawong where there are many very pushy doormen.. but up the soi is Dicks cafe where many farang go to eat… and one day I was going to eat also.. and told the doorman at the first gogo bar you come to in the soi.. and then all the rest.. they immediatly stopped mid-sentence and made way for me to go ‘eat’. Works everytime!
February 14th, 2008 at 3:44 am
I have been to Bangkok many times and still found loads of useful information on your site. Great Job! I’m currently in Bangkok for the rest of February. Wrapping up a condo purchase so I can be a part time resident.
February 17th, 2008 at 7:44 am
This is my first visit to the site, I must say it is one of the best Blog sites around, if not the best. I found it most informative, fun and honesty all in one.
Pleasae keep up the good work.
I am retireing to Pattaya later this year, and this has been most helful
Regards
JOHN
UK
February 29th, 2008 at 9:21 pm
Thanks so much for the blog. I made my first trip to Thailand last November. I went to get over a 8-year relationship that had ended. I had never really dated or even had sex with Asian guys before, and it was the last thing on my mind. Well, now I guess I am obsessed. I met a great Thai boy, and we chat and web cam everyday (sometimes hours) - I’ve got a real good guy in him. I am making a trip back in a few months, and I am meeting his family. What do I do? Any advice for making a good impression on the future in-laws?
February 29th, 2008 at 9:40 pm
Roger,
Get the book Culture Shock Thailand and read it from cover to cover about 3 times. Let the boy guide you in social protocol situations. Keep in mind Thais do not expect you to be Thai. In fact, your charm is that you are not. Don’t be surprised if his family’s living conditions are just a few steps above that of camping with a tent. Smile a lot!
March 1st, 2008 at 4:14 am
Roger,
Read the page he added. He knows what he is talking about. Having visited Thailand many times over the years, I watched this scenario play out over and over. He repeats “your situation is different” for a reason…..we all hear it over and over as well. And then the same results. You would be wise to take his advice to heart.
Jeff
March 2nd, 2008 at 9:34 am
Thanks for the advice (I had not read that book before). Yeah I know every situation is different, and I am no stranger to the rougher side of life and nobody’s mark. In the USMC I was stationed in Japan and Korea, so I’ve got the general feel for Asian culture. What is the dynamic between a gay son and his father, or sibilings in Thai culture? And my friend is an auditor and his family runs their own businesses so I think that we will do a little better than tents, but then that can be fun too. LOL
March 17th, 2008 at 6:41 pm
I am planning a move to Thailand in the next 18 months, but I can’t find any info on bringing pets (my dog) into the country. Do you have a reference?
March 17th, 2008 at 7:54 pm
Thailand does not have in place any form of quarantine system and it is very easy for expats moving to Thailand to bring their pets here.
However, people moving to Thailand should realize that rabies is a very real issue in Thailand, and so if they wish to relocate out of Thailand with their pets in the future to a country that does adopt a quarantine system, it is going to be extremely likely that they will need to quarantine their animal.
Also, it should be borne in mind that Thailand’s climate is not friendly to all types of animals being brought here - and certain pets need to constantly be kept in air-conditioned rooms if they are to survive the heat (especially during the hot months of April and May).
http://www.expatfocus.com/expatriate-thailand-pets
and this…
http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/index.php?showtopic=37829
April 15th, 2008 at 7:24 pm
I really like the tone of your blog and the fact that most of your posts are extremely thoughtful. So thoughtful, in fact, that most of the time I want to leave a comment. Unfortunately, you always seem to have the comments turned off.
I can guess why this is. There are some nasty, mean-spirited people who like to vent on other people’s blogs. Please consider letting them vent, though, because that would also give me the change to throw my opinions around.
The comment I would like to add to your latest post, about taking a cheap holiday to Thailand in at this time of year because prices are down is this: Don’t go to Pattaya. Stay in Bangkok. College students are on a three-month summer holiday (March-May). And a lot of the gay students hang in DJ Station every night. It’s fun, unpredictable and exciting. The only down side is you’re very likely to meet someone who, once you’ve gone back home, keeps begging you to come back for another visit. And he’s gonna be really convincing.
April 28th, 2008 at 12:26 pm
Hi, sorry this isn’t really a comment but more of a call for help! so I hope you read this and get back to me(Don’t Know How) or can you just include a sentence in your next post giving me an idea to my question.
I’ve followed your blog for the last 9 or 10 months now but wondered how much Thai boy info relates to Cambodia. I’m going over to do some voluntary work there for 5 months in November but the last thing I want to do is make the sort of ignorant mistakes I read about in your blog if I meet any guys over there, all the beat keep writing Atarkama.
May 4th, 2008 at 7:58 pm
Regarding throwing trash down the toilet, I think you may have 2 plumbing issues if you continue to do so. First, Not having a garbage disposal to chop up bones and other solid items means that you risk having your drain pipes clog if a few items catch on the pipe joints. More seriously — and maybe what some Thai boys know that you might not — is that many buildings, even in larger cities, use a septic tank. Much of what you throw away will not break down in a septic tank, and you will cause the tank to need to be pumped out significantly earlier than if you only use it for its intended purpose.
May 5th, 2008 at 1:35 am
Good point Steve,
What I flush, no bones, is mostly liquid with small pieces of vegetables, or leftover romin noodles. Only items of a consistency the toilet and plumbing are designed to handle. But your point is well made, as the boys may not know I’m being careful.
May 9th, 2008 at 11:37 am
Just over one month into a new relationship( my 2nd thai BF/Gik mathced in a gay dating website )–I find out by acccident that he has lied to me and is a barboy in Chiang Mai.. I have taken him traveling given gifts and lined his pockets with money, but he has never asked for anyting and i have never paid him for anything. I am not completely naive as i have paid for barboy sex before. In this case, it Turns out he has devised a storey to keep me from knowing the truth.. but now he claimss he was so afraid of losing me had i known the truth….especially after hearing my freqeunt bitter rantings about my ex thai BF who is a money boy. when he saw i was going to find out, about 5 weeks in,he broke the truth to me. He says that At 27 yrs old he believes he is past his MB prime and is looking for the farang daddy who can take care of him in his post MB life. he wants to take me home to the village and meet the parents to seal the deal-and become my official BF ( post Gik stage ) and will devote himself only to me… become my houseby/BF/parnter and servant. Is his story viable or am i blinded by my desire to find the ONE flower so i can stop being the butterfly. Am i a fool ? Can a barboy transition to BF once he past his professional prime years? Help.. I am so torn by this as I fallen in love with him. Anyone with suggestions please email me at bkaplan01@gmail.com .. thank you…
May 14th, 2008 at 3:52 am
Just a couple of comments on your “Country Names in Thai”:
Thai words can’t end with a “d” sound, so Angrit and Farangset would be more accurate.
And Cambodia is khmer (rhymes with “hair”).
May 18th, 2008 at 3:38 am
I’ve been in BKK now about 3 months and just recently stumbled across your site, I enjoy reading it and getting more info on the life here. Good job.
Karl
May 18th, 2008 at 11:33 pm
Hey me again with the new barboy bf. I have found your thoughts, to be varioiusly comforting, terrifying, startling, honest, obscure, but always provocative and insigtfull….. very helpful..
one question…. i hear the expression used both by thai and farang… “FANCY” i have heard it referring ot an attitude by thai boys ( eg. “its my fancy to have a youung blond falang”,) or directly from a thai boy (eg/”I fancy you sir…”) What does this mean .. Is it like pre love ???? or sexual attracction? or??
good Buddah day
May 19th, 2008 at 10:47 am
To fancy some1 is an old Engish expression, but not used much these days lol (Fancy = to be attracted to some1).
May 29th, 2008 at 9:02 pm
if some one says “its my fancy to have a youung blond falang” perhaps you are slightly mis-hearing them and they are actually saying “it’s my FANTASY to have a young, blond farang”
I like all of these little tidbits like the ugly baby thing. I recently bought a book called “Very Thai”. I haven’t had a chance to read it yet. The font is tiny and it seems fairly dense, but it basically is an exploration of Thai ways and why they do the things they do that seem so mysterious to farang. Apparently the author has lived in BKK for quite a long time and has published magazines and written the Time Out guide. It is all heavily researched. It will take me a while to get through it, but I think it is recommendable. I believe it may be out of print. I got my copy from a seller on Amazon and had to pay a small fortune for it. But if you are in Thailand it is published there so may be available locally.
May 30th, 2008 at 9:33 pm
Over the last day I read and viewed your entire blog. You’re a good writer and great tour guide to the gay culture of Thailand. I love your adventurous spirit and your curious nature. I’m about your age and I don’t know if I’d be brave enough to take on the unrelenting process of acclimating myself to a new location and culture so far removed from everything that’s familiar to me. I had no idea how nuanced and intricate money boy pick-up rituals could be. I’m sure I’d do everything wrong for years. Without a friend like you who’s managed to learn a lot of the ‘native ways’ I’d be lost and hopeless. From now on I’ll check out your blog a couple times a week hoping you’ll continue to post more interesting stories and photos about your life in the ‘land of smiles.’ Thanks for producing this interesting and entertaining bog.
June 15th, 2008 at 9:53 pm
Hi I am a 50yo GAM and enjoyed reading yr blogss. I also planned to retire in Thailand when I saved enough. By the way, I wish you could provide a monthly/yearly cost breakdown of yr retirement in Thailand. I will be visiting Singapore and the on to Thailand in July. Maybe we can meet for lunch? I would love to buy you lunch for providing such a valuable resource.
Bob
June 15th, 2008 at 10:17 pm
Hi Bob,
Thanks for the kind words.
It is a bit difficult to offer a budget for living in Thailand, as there are so many variables…
What standard of living do you want to enjoy?
What city will you live in, and in BKK what specific area will you settle? The closer you are to the MRT or BTS the more you pay for housing.
How much one partakes of the night life, drinking and boys, can have a huge impact on the monthly budget.
Of course, as we get older medical expenses are a consideration.
For a modest lifestyle estimate, use the Thai Immigration monthly income requirement of 65,000 baht (roughly $2000) to qualify for a retirement visa. That is pretty darn accurate, but maybe a little low if you plan on spending a lot of money on drinking and boys.
July 9th, 2008 at 4:56 am
I would love to meet you for dinner and/or a drink if you are interested. I have thoroughly enjoyed your website for quite some time now, and I am in BKK through mid-August. Feel free to email me.
Jeff
July 11th, 2008 at 4:35 am
Got to tell you after reading you for over a year and traveling to Thailand often on business, your insight and fair opinion is so refreshing. I also sense that you like myself love the Thais and naturally feel somewhat protective even while disclosing all the downs of being a farang there. I was really disappointed at the treatment the boy got from asshole in Holland and I wish there were some way to teach more boys to put these jerks in place so they don’t poison the minds any more than has been done
Is there any way to contribute to your blog or show appreciation?
July 11th, 2008 at 11:27 pm
Thanks Ron, for the kind words. The are appreciation enough.
July 14th, 2008 at 3:54 am
hi there
As a regular visitor to Thailand over many yearsI have always felt “on the fringe”,never too sure just how things work when meeting thai guys. I have recently discovered your blog and want to say thanks for so much useful informatiom,and for the positive attitude you display towards Thais,
J
July 14th, 2008 at 3:59 am
Thanks John
July 22nd, 2008 at 10:02 am
Hi, I’ve been reading through your site and I love it. You should think about writing your own travel book for Thailand (if you haven’t done it yet). One thing I haven’t found yet, so I wanted to ask, was about meeting and making friends in Phuket. I’m traveling there in a few days and my travel buddy dropped out at the last second so now I’m alone.
I’m bi-curious and I’ve never really had any m/m experiences but I’d like to try something while I’m traveling. Plus it’s be great to maybe go to the beach or go shopping with other people. Do you have any advice?
Thanks
July 22nd, 2008 at 7:14 pm
for your language page: “He very specail for my life and still lay in my heart every time but he have bf …so funny”.
“So funny”, of course, doesn’t mean humorous at all. It’s always said with sadness or even anger.
Secondly, it seems common for them to say “I don’t mind” when they really mean “I don’t like”. This can be a big problem if you are suggesting somewhere to go eat, etc.
July 22nd, 2008 at 11:33 pm
Thanks Drake…no book plans as of yet.
I’d suggest posting at the Sawatdee Gay Thailand Forum, and see if you get any takers. A lot of expats enjoy showing first time visitors around, of you might meet someone else that’s traveling alone and would like the company. You should also ask if there is any one place all the expats hang out at. These are always good locations to meet people living in the area. It you would prefer meeting a Thai, I’suggest visiting Gay Romeo, but keep in mind many of the guys there are money boys.
July 22nd, 2008 at 11:34 pm
Thanks mahjongguy…I’ll add it to the page.
July 30th, 2008 at 8:14 pm
Thanks for the information you have posted here it is a fantastic resource in attempting to understand the Thai boys attitude towards us foreigners who enjoy them and their country so much.
I was hoping you may be able to answer a couple of questions for me please.
I have been to phuket a few times but never alone and only had massages with some wonderful boys. In sept I am going back again for 3 weeks but alone this time and will be able to enjoy myself a lot more I am sure.
I am a bottom only and from what I understand a lot of the boys are not gay so prefer to top is this a correct assumption to make.
Do the boys understand the terms top / bottom / vers and is this the type of conversation to have with them before you off them or is it not considered polite to discuss in the bar etc.
I am not at all into anything kinky but like a lot of bottoms I really enjoy anal play rimming etc by the top to me is this something that the Thai boys will do or is it like some cultures where it is considered very offensive, I would not like to upset them by asking for something that is considered this way.
If you take a boy for a short off is it considered that once you have both cum then he leaves & if you ask him to stay until he can perform again then it is considered that he stays the night, I guess this is the hope of all us bottoms to get a multiple performance from some poor top!!
If a massage boy comes to you room do you generally pay him the fee you would pay to his massage place as well as the amount you would pay him as well.
If I wanted to off two boys for a 3 some, they would not have to touch each other if they didnt want to , is it something they like doing & how is the best way to arrange this
I hope you dont mind me asking these questions I may have some more before I leave so thanks for your help in advance
July 30th, 2008 at 9:05 pm
Ian,
Most of what you ask is already answered by reading all the posts and the pages in the side bar.
See Making A Sandwich for details about setting up a 3-way, but understand most boys do not like them. They consider it very degrading. They don’t understand why they are not enough to satisfy. Trying to set up a 3-way is always an expensive gamble, even if the boys say OK, it can end in disappointment. If you already have a boy that you absolutely know is into 3-ways, and you let him do all the talking, and you let him pick the other boy, it will be great.
Every boy is different when it comes to rimming. Some like it and others do not. Some are only passive. Those that do not like it will call it dirty.
The boy is only obligated to cum and make you cum once, even if he stays the night. Anything after that is at his discretion. If he’s a real good boy, and you off him for long-time, he will probably have sex with you more than one time. If the boy fancies you, he’ll probably have sex with you more than one time, even if you take him short time. Of course, money always talks.
Most boys are bottoms. The tops are a mix of gay, bi, and straight - by Thai standards which, in my opinion is really bi.
It is totally appropriate to discuss with the boy what he will do before offing him. Unfortunately, most will tell you they do anything, even if they do not, particularly those that are in the gogo bars. Most mamasans will also tell you the boy will do anything. Most boys you meet on-line are honest about what they will or will not do, but not all.
Massage places have a special price for out services. Some already have the boy’s tip included in that price. If it does not, then the boy gets tipped the same as he would in house.
Before asking any more questions, I suggest reading everything.
September 19th, 2008 at 12:14 pm
Really just a private message to you.
Thank you for taking the time to share your experiences.
Up until now, I’ve been reading the message forums and was under the impression that there were a lot of unstable and bitter Farang hanging out in Thailand; you’ve shifted my impression considerably. Because of your blog, I believe I’ve gained a better understanding of Thai people and have a better idea of how to better interact with Thai and Farang the next time I visit.
Again, thank you and all the best.
September 19th, 2008 at 11:54 pm
Les,
I’ve been contemplating doing a piece about the gay Thailand forums, and after your comment I believe I will. You might be surprised to discover most of those bitter soles have been to the Land of Smiles, but are not actually living here now. Those that are jaded xpats have only themselves to blame, and I hope this blog explains some of the reasons why.
November 24th, 2008 at 4:36 am
I just got back from my trip to Thailand and I have to tell you that your website really came in handy. Something I thought I’d mention, that you might want to put on your website, is about taking a hot shower.
If found out in the course of my trip that thais, both male and females, are very sensitive when it comes to a hot shower. Water that feels warm to me, literally causes your date/friend-for-the-night/masseur to jump away for fear of being scalded. Most, in my opinion, prefer to keep the temperature mild or at the temp of an outdoor pool. I learned after a bit of time that if the shower or bath produces a little steam, it might be too hot for them.
It could just be me, but I thought I’d mention it.
Again, thanks for the great blog!
November 24th, 2008 at 11:52 am
Thanks Collin,
You make a good point about the hot water. I’ll add to the shower page why that is.
November 26th, 2008 at 1:15 pm
Cool, glad that I could help. BTW I’ve been hearing about all the troubles going on there. Hope you’re alright.
November 29th, 2008 at 11:58 am
Hi RQ.
My bf in Klongsan tells me the ‘govt’ has recommended citizens stay indoors this evening (Sat 28).
Does this suggest imminent police/military action ? Do you know which areas of the city are most likely to be affected?
Curious and concerned.
Yraen
November 29th, 2008 at 12:51 pm
I’m sorry, but I do not know anything more than one can learn from the news media, and they aren’t of much use. I do find it interesting and a bit odd that anyone would be told to stay indoors this evening.
December 4th, 2008 at 8:12 am
Dear RQD,
Excellent website and writing!! Your topic selection is brilliant and I concur with your perpectives 100! Afterall, I’m about to leave for my 17th trip to Thailand, political protests or not, as long as BKK is open, I will enjoy.
Thanks for your excellent work.
January 4th, 2009 at 1:59 pm
I really enjoy reading your information. It is exceptional,easy to read and understand. I am planning a trip to thailand and your site is preparing me like none other will. Thank you and all the best to you in the new year!
January 20th, 2009 at 11:16 am
Enlightening for sure. A couple of comments:
Cost of living: My total outlay monthly (rent, utilites, adsl) for my very nicely done and furnished, well located 12th floor studio condo nicely located in Chiang Mai (5yr+) has ranged between 9K-10K. You 35K-45K seem really high even for BKK.
Banking: An FYI; Bangkok Bank, as far as I know, is the only bank in Thailand that will take Direct Deposit from SSA (USA). That and a savings account along with work nicely.
Last but not least by any means is your well thought out and researched information about Thai culture and, more specifically, Thai-Farrang relationships is invaluable . . . Thank you.
January 25th, 2009 at 4:44 am
RQ,
Simply put before I get into a dessertation.
Didn’t know you were here.
Didn’t know you left.
But glad as hell you’re back.
Thanks for the informative blog on the gay scene without pushing any particular place without regard to what people want to be informed on.
January 31st, 2009 at 7:41 am
Interesting that you advertise for Privateboymovie and Asiaboys so much on your site…..both of these sites are blocked in Thailand….
January 31st, 2009 at 8:09 am
I am required to give credit in return for the use of the photos, and the majority of my readers do not live in Thailand.
February 4th, 2009 at 5:21 pm
Time doesn’t permit me the pleasure of keeping up with your diary as well as I’d like so I just read your entry on boy’s rooms. I’m pleased you felt my piece on Sawatdee Gay Thailand was worth linking to - thanks! Feel free to contact me via email - I’d enjoy meeting you if schedules allow.
Best wishes,
bao-bao
February 13th, 2009 at 3:21 am
Interesting site - I’m learning a lot. I am a gay man living in the United States and only date asians. I love Thai guys as they are so nice and just a pleasure to be around, but I’ve never dated one. How do I get past my western morality that says, “sex for money is wrong”? I have a friend who goes to Thailand every other month and tells me the culture is so different from ours in that respect, that they don’t see it like that and I should just go and have fun. Am I hopeless?
thanks.
February 13th, 2009 at 4:13 am
Kurt,
Your friend is correct, but why do you assume you have to pay for sex? There are many boys here that will go with farang for free. The younger and/or thinner you are the more abundant this is, but free sex can be had for all. The difference is, by paying, you can get what you want, when you want, and when here only for a short time it is, for many, the most convenient.
February 23rd, 2009 at 2:11 am
Dear Webmaster,
I have some very good friends but unfortunately many of them have very bad breath. Even after cleaning teeth with toothpaste and then a mouthwash rinse doesn’t fix the problem. Have you encountered this and if so do you know how to fix the problem.?
David
March 18th, 2009 at 4:15 pm
hey there!!!
first off, let me just say, i found your site quite informative and amusing. i have been following your posts for quite some time now. There’s an objectivity about your posts which i really like. it’s nice to see a farang treating these boys with the kind of respect and consideration you do. I’m not Thai, but my heart goes out to these guys. My godfather once told me how he had a long distance Thai boyfriend in the 80s. They’re a sweet people, the closest fellow South East Asians I can relate to being a Filipino myself… Thanks, and here’s wishing you the best.
the barefoot baklesa
March 24th, 2009 at 1:11 pm
Hi
I just wanted to let you know how much I enjoy your site. I live in NY now but have been to Thailand 5 times and really enjoyed it, especially Pattaya. I would love to retire there too and have always wondered whether I would enjoy it. The subtext of your site says YES. I really admire your cultural sensitivity - as an infrequent visitor I find it very confusing. I have always tried to be considerate but in a western sense which just isn’t the same. As a result some boys have taken advantage of me and I have very unintentionally given some small offense on occasion. Keep up the good work so we can all be good visitors while also having fun!
Bruce
March 27th, 2009 at 11:47 am
I just wanted to tell you how wonderful your blog has been for me. I am spending more and more time in Thailand and reading your stories has been a big help. Keep up the good work -
April 2nd, 2009 at 4:28 pm
What a marvelous blog. I’ve retired to Chiang Mai since last August and the all the things you have to say about the gorgeous boys and the fascinating Thai culture are so true and informative. I have added some of my own personal experiences re Thai banking and Thai boy categories/types. I will keep on reading. Thanks a million! Best wishes, David
April 18th, 2009 at 2:21 pm
Have you had much interaction with your boyfriend’s family? My bf lives in the rural areas and there are financial expectations placed upon me which have put some pressure on the relationship. The farang seems to be expected to pay for everything for any outings and it has been suggested a monthly allowance would be appropriate. This part of Thai/farang partnerships may make an interesting entry for your blog. I am generous but caution is required in this matter.
April 26th, 2009 at 2:47 pm
Hello Sir,
I have discovered your blog few days ago and I am reading it with great pleasure. I am a man in his 30s living in Cambodia, another great place full of beautiful and cute boys. I really would like to know you if I go sometime to Thailand. Thank you again for these nice posts and work. Alex
April 28th, 2009 at 1:25 am
I don’t know where on your most excellent site to ask this question so I’ll plonk it down here. Do Thais have bars only for themselves that are beside the regular places. My real question is: Do Thais have drag bars for their Inner Dolly Parton? What about leather bars or S&M bars? Do those concepts exist in gay Thailand.
Thanks
May 2nd, 2009 at 1:47 am
I just came across your site and have read every entry for this year. I’ve been living with a young Thai man for 16 happy months now yet I find my experiences so different from yours. In any event, I have learned quite a bit from you and given time, will read the rest of your postings. Good job.
May 7th, 2009 at 12:34 pm
Thank you for keeping this blog up. I have read it all now, and enjoyed most of it a lot because I recognise so much trivia on language and culture. The posts on moneyboys and gogobars in particular on the contrary learned me a lot. Although I have learned to know Silom very well over the past 8 or so years, that part I am only limited familiar with (im not patronising now, i am not in a position to do so, hehe.) I am truly sorry for what happenened with the comments on another post today, and was looking for an email adress I could contact you through to tell you that in private. I refuse to keep the tread alive, so I will not comment there again. On the other hand I am very, very curious to know if someone might actually have something constructive on the subject, because it affects my bf, and thus also myself. Feel free to contact me through mail yourself if you hear or learn something from the boys directly that you want to discuss, or dont want to post as is.
May 25th, 2009 at 5:13 pm
I discovered your blog quite recently and am fascinated by it. With an interest, of course, as I have found myself doing more for some one than I expected to, despite many reasons not to.
I’m sure this is common, and its good to know that I’m not alone.
Also generalisations about Thai culture and people are too easy to make. Your blog helps with understanding and awareness.
We all make our own decisions in life. and live by them.
June 8th, 2009 at 11:28 pm
Hi, I just wanted to introduce myself and congratulate you on your great site.
I was in the US Army in Sattihip in the 70s for 4 years. I worked as an interpreter and as a technical instructor with the Thai Army. Fell in love with Thailand and its beautiful people. Since then I have been back many times, I currently live with my Thai partner of 6 years in Reno Nevada, I work at the University here while he is a Nurse at a local senior care facility. We just bought a house in Ban Klang near Wat Chinwarara. I will be retiring there part time in a couple of years. I love your stories and insight, as a 50 ish GWM I can relate! Although when it comes to preferences in Thai men we would not be in competition as I tend toward late 30 to 40s in age and the more muscles and or definition the better 555. But I do love the hot pix on your site anyway. Because I speak Thai fluently I have had many enlightening experiences often at odds with those described on many bitter Expat web sites. You seem like the type of guy that would be fun to get to know and swap stories. Please ignore the trolls and keep up the great work!
Wishing you the best, Bill Brinsmead
June 12th, 2009 at 11:27 pm
I was wondering if you might have any information on the cost/fees to send a Thai boy to university. My boyfriend lives near Korat and has two subjects to finish his degree with Rhamkamheng University. He is working 12 hours a day in a factory trying to save some money for his fees. He has not asked for any help, I have known him for two years and is a very honest guy. I want to help him finish his degree and I believe you may have already been through this process with your Thai friends, any information appreciated.
July 4th, 2009 at 12:10 am
Why haven’t you commented on the shakedown arrests scandal that is scaring everyone away from Thailand? I bought a travel guide to read before visiting, then put it all on hold because of the horror stories about what is happing in that county.
July 17th, 2009 at 9:42 am
Thanks for your fine and informative website. Iam an older guy now. Been visiting SEA for a number of years. Long ago, I started going to Babylon and found it a very successful place to score. I dont care for the commerical sex scene anymore. I recently was told about the Ramhangheng area. Would you please do a piece about that area and also about the Beach Residence area? Thais tell me that is an area that is also a great spot to hook up. Looking forward to your response. Thanks
July 27th, 2009 at 9:05 am
What do you think about fair skin thais vs those who have darker skin? Is there social inequality, a class society or status differentiation among them? I see and sense that there are, and observed that the fairer ones are generally well-off and better educated. Is this situation somewhat entrenched in thai society?
July 27th, 2009 at 11:38 am
Vin,
In my opinion there is most definitely an inequality. I told the story before of the light skinned boy I was helping prepare a resume (CV). In Thailand that includes a photo, which I took several of him to select from. He politely asked that we shoot some more, because all the photos I had taken made his skin look too dark. He said if his skin looked too dark he would most likely get passed over for an interview.
July 28th, 2009 at 8:29 am
Dear Webmaster,
Could you please clear up a possible confusion that I have?
Is your excellent Blog associated with that book by the same name, called “Rice Queen Diaries” by Daniel Gawthrop? While I am sure this Blog is a virtual sequel to the book, (a “Part II” if you will) my friend, who also read the book, disagrees.
Whomever is correct gets a free evening’s worth of Thai beer of choice(!) …so I’m looking forward to your clarifying this.
Thanks! Keep up the GREAT work!
Pawpcorn (three year experienced expat escapee from California’s gloom and doom)
July 28th, 2009 at 8:56 am
Pawpcorn,
Your friend gets the suds. I am in no way associated with the book. In fact, I didn’t even know it existed when I selected this blog’s domain name and title. After discovering the book, I added a link to a review by Brian Curtin, who I subsequently met here in BKK. From what I understand the book by Daniel Gawthrop is a serious academic read. I certainly hope that’s not how my writing is viewed.
July 28th, 2009 at 2:39 pm
Ah, got ya there, and now I see the link to the RQD book review, too… thanks so much for the clarification!
Regarding the book, besides containing some background academic information, it contained MANY personal accountings of his many adventures and experiences here in LOS, and other Asian countries, so it was really quite interesting reading… in many ways, quite similar to your semi-daily blog entries; fascinating reading, for a self confessed “rice queen” like myself.
I do want to mention that I really admire the respect and admiration for the Thai “boys” and Thais in general, that are contained within your writings. I share these views, also.
Thanks for the speedy reply, and keep up the good work!
Best regards,
Pawpcorn
August 4th, 2009 at 4:59 am
Thanks for all the info. I have been seeing a young Thai man here in Texas for massages for 6 months now, although our sessions go way beyond massage most of the time. He is still learning English so its is sometimes difficult to share ideas or explain our cultures to each other. He is studying English so he says that will change. He introduced me to Budhism and showed me his personal Temple last week.Your website greatly enhances my knowledge of Thai culture and really helps me to understand him so much better. I’ll keep following your posts.
September 7th, 2009 at 8:51 am
Dear RQD,
Since your recent server change, the links on the top of your pages do not work–just thought you might want to know.
September 7th, 2009 at 9:16 am
Thanks TKA, but I’m not seeing any problems. They all work for me. I assume you are talking about the 5 options, including HOME at top of page.
September 17th, 2009 at 10:32 am
Dear RQD
I am 47 and made my first and second trips to Thailand in late Dec 2008 until the end of March 2009 with 12 days back in the UK. I met my BF after the first 5 days. My Thai sister in law has checked him out and given her approval, but I am aware of the possible problems etc. Thanks for your excellent and informative Blog. I have now read your entire site, the cultural information is excellent and helps give real perspective in dealing with Thais. I was fascinated with the section about ‘Kreng Jai’ and ‘Jai Yen’ it gives a real insight into the Thai psych I know my BF was exasperated sometimes helping me avoid social gaffs etc. I will be back in Thailand for 3 months from the 28th of Nov. I will be based in Pattaya but will travel around a bit and may well make a second visit to Bangkok. It would be great if we could meet up for a few drinks either in Pattaya or in Bangkok, please feel free to contact me via email.
October 17th, 2009 at 4:59 pm
Dear RQD,
I’ve visited many many websites in my day and have been going to LOS for close to 12 years. I have never seen such insights before. I thought I knew alot, not everything for sure, but alot. After reading your insights, I am just dumb founded. I’m asian, but never thought of all the things you have written. Easy heart is something I just never even thought of. Excuse my ramblings, its just I’m so excited after reading your site. Thank you Thank you. I hope to use what I have learned and maybe impress my thai friends and bf when I return to Thailand in 4 weeks. Once again, thank you.
December 6th, 2009 at 11:54 pm
Ok had the most uncomfortable situation with the BF last night. We came over to Pattaya for the weekend. The BF did not get jealous when the Russian boy flirted, and even went to Boyz Boyz Boyz for the birthday show. But when we were back in our hotel, he started going through my wallet. I asked him why and he said he was curious about wallets. I told him that that was very rude and I would not have done that to him. Needless to say the bed was cold last night. What am I missng?
December 7th, 2009 at 12:39 am
Well, on the surface you did nothing wrong, BUT.
It is very common for boys to be curious and look at the contents of someone’s wallet. Many do not consider it bad behavior, particularly those from the lower social classes. Thais do not like being told they did wrong, especially when they think their conduct was appropriate. You should have explained this to him in terms of cultural difference. The first thing you need to explain is what the word private means, and make sure he does not misinterpret it to mean the same as secret. Then explain that wallets and cell phones (add anything else to that list you want kept private) are considered private by farang and it will make them angry if “anyone” looks inside with out permission…stress anyone, including a very close friend. Then say something like you understand he did not know this about farang, but now he does.
Thais rarely chastise each other, something we westerners have difficulty adjusting to. The better you get at it the less cold nights you’ll have in bed.
January 10th, 2010 at 12:41 am
Are most movies at the cinemas in BKK,and Chiang Mai mostly in English with Thai subtitles? Will be Chiang Mai for a month and may want to take one in and may ask a Thai guy to accompany me
January 10th, 2010 at 1:06 am
Phil,
As a general rule the western movies have Thai subtitles and the Asian, including Thai, have the reverse. If you go to movies more than one time with the same boy let him pick an Asian movie the second time and you suffer through the subtitles. Its only fair. However, avoid Thai comedies (joking movies) and they often do not translate very well. I strongly recommend taking a boy to the cinema, particularly if you have never been to one in Thailand. Things work a bit different here, such as you select your seats when purchasing the tickets, and the boy can help you navigate it with ease. You won’t have a problem finding a boy that’s willing to go to the movies. If you order popcorn, tell the boy you want kim (salty) or you may end up with the sweet version. Just before the movie starts they will play a tribute to the King of Thailand. Everyone stands for this, so be ready. Also keep in mind cameras are not allowed inside the theater.
January 10th, 2010 at 2:01 am
Thanks so much for the information, I really do appreciate it. Now all I have to do is meet a nice Thai guy in Chiang Mai……
January 11th, 2010 at 1:23 am
Any reports regarding Chiang Rai, and a place/places to visit in the evening where one might meet the locals?
January 11th, 2010 at 4:09 am
Sorry Phil, but I’m in BKK.
January 11th, 2010 at 12:14 pm
No problem, just thought you might have visited Chiang Rai and have had an insight into places to go. My last week will be in BKK and I am so looking forward to being there again.
February 27th, 2010 at 7:16 am
do you know anything about Korat? seems like the gay community here is very discreet/quiet or almost non-existent.
February 27th, 2010 at 11:03 pm
kizoku,
I’ve done several posts about Korat. Just do a search for it. There are lots of gays there, but only one sauna and I’ve heard there is a bar now, but it probably won’t last. In most places around Thailand the gays go to the same clubs the straights do. Korat is no different.
May 21st, 2010 at 1:42 am
Hope you, Leo, Princess and the rest of the boys are safe during these disturbing times in Thailand.
Don
June 21st, 2010 at 10:14 pm
here’s another link for you pattaya links section
http://www.sawadeeboys.com
Cheers x
November 6th, 2010 at 8:59 pm
Hi
Hope you and everyone are ok, been missing your posts, nothing since Aug, so I am just passing on my best wishes and hoping you are ok?
R
November 25th, 2010 at 12:29 pm
I do hope that you are o.k. You usually post once a month, yet the most recent post is from August. You are certainly missed by many readers. You have my best wishes for your health and happiness. Happy Thanksgiving!