Right up front I want to make it perfectly clear that I am not a Buddhist, and have only a limited understanding of this ancient religion. Please understand that when I get into some specifics, they are overly simplified, and possibly misinterpreted. The purpose of this document is to offer some foundational understanding of Buddhist practices and places of worship, so I can reference it when writing posts related to the subject. I won’t get into the Buddhist belief system, as it is not relevant to the goal of this document. On top of that I’m not qualified.

BUDDHISM IS PERSONAL

It is just an observation, and I could be totally wrong, but my impression is Buddhism is more of a personal daily lifestyle than a relationship with a particular flock and their church. In other words, with Christians, everything generally revolves around the physical church building and those that congregate inside. With Buddhists, devotion is not measured by how often one goes to the wat. The wat is a Buddhist’s equivalent to a Christian church, but more like a compound, or monastery, housing several buildings, including the temple. (Read this for more details on Thai wats)

Generally speaking, Buddhists usually only visit the wat on special religious holidays, birthdays and other days of family oriented significance, but typically don’t go on a weekly schedule, like Christians and their Sunday church services. Put flippantly, Buddhists will also go to the wat when they feel a need, or want, to get some religion. I’m sure it’s a lot more complex than I make it sound, but the point is Buddhism is more personal than it is congregational.

ALTARS

Devout Buddhists practice, for lack of a better description, a twice daily prayer ritual that includes, at a minimum, the lighting of two candles, and three sticks of incense, followed by a prayer. This ritual usually takes place around 6am and 6pm, but the actual times are more flexible, particularly with those living a metropolitan lifestyle. This ritual can be performed at the wat, public shrines, or in one’s home. Obviously, it is more practical to perform this twice daily ritual at home, and I think most do.

A special altar or shrine is used to perform this ritual. For the sake of simplicity I’ll just call it an altar. There are many items that can be included on an altar, but at a minimum it will have two vase with fresh flowers, two candle holders, one incense holder, and at least one figure (small statue) of Buddha. Depending on the size of the small Buddha, a platform will be used to elevate it above all the offerings.

There are some rules about the positioning of the altar. In most cases, but not all, the altar is elevated, so you must look up at it. There is also some sort of consideration concerning its relationship to sun rise and sun set, but I don’t know the details. I have no doubt there are other details I am unaware of.

Altars will have one or more different representations of Buddha, each with its own significance. Westerners tend to think of a stereotype Buddha - the fat man with a big pot belly. In reality, he is only one representation of the religious icon. There are seven different Buddhas for each day of the week, with a significance relating to the day of the week a person was born. The pot belly Buddha has to do with wealth. Another (with a walking stick) has to do with travel, and what seems to be the most prominent, or most significant, is a seated figure that has to do with meditation. There is even a baby Buddha, and small toys are presented as offerings if one is included on an altar. There are others, but I don’t know the specifics.

Source: Photos by Luka Esenko

Food and drink offerings are placed on the altar during the morning ritual. Old flowers are replaced with fresh at this time, as well. From what I have observed, Buddha likes water or tea. Best I can tell fruit is the preferred food offering. There does seem to be preferences for the types of flowers used, but I don’t know the specifics, other than roses are apparently not on the preferred list. It may have something to do with the thorns, but I don’t know for sure.

Food and drink are acquired and prepared specifically for Buddha. They are not part of the meal others in the home will eat or drink before or at the same time. Food can be eaten after it is removed from the altar, and when drinks are replaced with fresh the old should be used to water plants. Drinks apparently are offered daily, but food is given less frequently, and flowers are replaced as needed.

One should not smell the flowers before placing them on the altar, as they are not for your enjoyment. To do so would render them inappropriate as an offering to Buddha. If any item for the altar, including candles and incense, falls on the floor, it can not be used. You do not approach, touch items, or prey before the altar with your shirt off. You should wai Buddha before touching or removing anything from the altar.

You will also see these altars in shops. I even saw one in a dentist office, but the flowers were artificial, and while the incense and candles were in place, they had never been lit. I assume this is a compromised in keeping with the need to maintain a more sterile environment.

Best I can determine, any multi home structure, such as apartment buildings and condos, have an altar outside. Its intent is to replace the need for individual altars in each home unit of the building, but does not preclude individuals from establishing their own private altar. The community altar is maintained by a volunteer, but may be used by anyone.

Many Thais will forego keeping a private altar, as they feel “covered” by the one established for the community of residents. This is understandable considering the commitment required to maintain one privately. Boys that work in the nightly entertainment scene will sleep till 2, or later, in the afternoon, making it impractical to maintain a private altar.

I’m probably oversimplifying this, but as I understand it, the twice daily ritual involves asking Buddha to watch over and bring prosperity, good health, and safety to the home, its occupants, and other family members.

I’ve talked a lot about altars, because it might be very important information if you enter into a relationship with a Thai boy.

WATS

It should be no surprise that Thais typically frequent the wat nearest to their residence. They will also, on occasion, travel further to visit a wat of special significance. Best I can tell, importance is based on a historical event or period, or the wat is home to a monk that is highly revered.

Wats vary in size, but from my limited observation typically take up an area about the size of a city block. While it will vary from one wat to the next, they tend to be open to the public during day light and early evening hours. Some facilities requiring staffing operate during business hours, usually closing at 6pm. Monks are not available after 4pm, because they all go to prey/chant.

Wats do have dress codes. Some will require long pants, while others will allow long (below the knees) shorts. Some wats do not allow sleeveless shirts and tank tops are always inappropriate. There are special requirements for women, both in dress and conduct, but I don’t know the specifics.

Shoes must be removed when entering the temple and some other buildings within the wat. From what I am able to determine, sox may be worn, but don’t be surprised if some wats differ on this. While inside the temple, you must sit with your feet pointed away from Buddha. Do not take pictures inside the temple, and be respectful of other areas, such as the monks’ quarters. If you are a smoker, make sure to ask what areas of the wat compound permit smoking.

Some wats, that are also major tourist attractions charge an entry free to those that are not Thai citizens. I’ve paid as little as 20 baht and as much as 250. Thai citizens are exempt from the fee, because they pay taxes.

MONKS

While the monks do teach and offer spiritual advice, I think it’s safe to say most, or at least a substantial portion of the spiritual upbringing is delivered by parents and other family elders. At least that’s been my take on it thus far.

There is definitely some sort of hierarchy among monks, but I don’t know any detail other than it exists. I do know that certain ceremonies, such as the blessing of positions, can only be performed by senior monks.

I say blessed, because I don’t know what else to call it. In very general terms, monks are called upon to give spiritual blessing to a variety of personal positions. Smaller things, such as items that will go on an altar, can be taken to the wat for blessing. Larger items, such as a home, condo, car, or motorcycle involve the monk, or monks, coming to the person’s home to perform the blessing. If you see a series of painted dots, in the shape of a triangle, over the door of a home or on the interior roof of a taxi, you know it has been blessed by the monks. I assume an entire chapter could be written on this, but my knowledge and understanding of it takes up a short paragraph.

Source: Photos by Luka Esenko

Monks are also involved with major family events, such as funerals, and weddings, but I can not offer any details. I do know that monetary donations are given to monks when they perform these ceremonies. Best I can tell, the amount donated is determined, at least in part, by what the monk(s) have been asked to do, and by how many are involved.

There are a number of opportunities for a Buddhist to provide donations while visiting the wat, the details of which are outside my scope of understanding. The important thing to remember is you do not ask for change before making the donation. Some things have a fixed price, while others are completely up to each individual’s generosity. But to ask for change would be extremely disrespectful.

All Thai boys are expected, by their family, to become a monk for a brief time in their life, actually a couple of times. The first of the two is when a boy is under the age of 20. The second, at what seems to be more important, is after the boy turns 20, the age when boys in Thailand are “legally” considered adults. However, boys are not truly considered adults until they have become a monk for a brief period. It can be done at any age after 20, but the preference seems to be between the ages of 20 and 22. The only answer I have gotten as to why this should be done before age 22 is “because good”, so there you have it.

Source: Thailand Life

From what I gather, the length of time a boy lives his life as a monk varies from 1 week to several months, but most opt for 30 days. My take on this is anything under 30 days is not considered to be overly sincere. A boy’s transition to monk hood involves a rather lengthy ceremony that includes the shaving of his head and eyebrows. Family and close friends attend this ceremony, and to be invited would be an honor.

For obvious reasons, a boy will return to his home town for this time in his life. Returning home has a practical aspect to it, as well. Apparently the boy has to depend on someone to bring him food every day, a burden best placed on the shoulders of his loving family. I mention this because a lot of boys leave their home town to work, and/or meet a farang boy friend, in one of the tourist dominated cities of Thailand. Becoming a monk is something many boys feel a strong obligation to do, and a consideration you should make when contemplating a long-term relationship with a Thai boy.

I highly recommend visiting some of the wats while in Thailand. Many of them are really quite spectacular. I do hope you will conduct yourself with a little more respect than I have observed with a lot of ignorant or indifferent tourists.

For some additional reading, and lots of photos, I suggest visiting the following web sites.

Thai Buddhist
Thailand Life
Thailand Photos by Luka Esenko
Buhdda Statue Images

I have opened this page to comments, but would appreciate it if you would limit your remarks to expanding on what I’ve presented, or correcting any errors I have made.