The other night I was out with my American friend conducting some additional research for a post I have planned. The study involved consuming massive quantities of whiskey, a task we managed to achieve rather successfully. Upon completion of the experiment, and the subsequent shagging of a couple of cute boys in a seedy Silom Soi 6 bar, we headed for the Burger King to debrief and compare notes.

As we were about to pass the Sala Deang BTS station, three ladyboys approached from the opposite direction. Instead of passing us by, one walked right up and started grabbing on me, as if to suggest I had caught her fancy. Unbeknownsed to me, another was circling around for a pass at my wallet when my friend stepped in and physically drove the girls off. One of the “ladies” called us a hia (huge insult), at which point I returned fire with a very angry OY, and we all continued on our respective ways.

Now I’m fully aware of the reputation ladyboys have for being pick pockets, but in my inebriated state had no idea that’s what was happening. It was only after things calmed down my friend explained what had just transpired. In the process of expressing my gratitude for his quick thinking it came out my friend was completely unaware of the reputation ladyboys have. As it turns out, my well traveled bar buddy had experienced similar in Barcelona, and immediately recognized what was going down. I’m not sure I would have caught it, even if sober, and consider myself a very lucky guy to have been in the company of someone so fast on his feet. It’s even more impressive when you factor in he was just as shit faced as me.

When in high-risk areas such as Silom, MBK, and other crowded tourist spots, I’m very good about relocating my wallet to a zippered pant leg pocket. Thinking it was late at night, and the crowds were gone, I consciously reasoned it was safe to carry my wallet in the back pocket, a mistake I’ll never make again.

I never go out with more money than I need for the night. By that hour I was down to a few hundred baht, enough for Burger King and a taxi home. None the less, the thought of having to replace other contents of my wallet makes me shudder. I was very fortunate the evening ended with a little excitement and no grief.

Another night in Bangkok…live and learn!

I’ve just added the following update to the Shower Time page…

Here are a couple of things I have recently learned that clear up some questions I’ve had about showering.

Photo Courtesy of Asia Boy

Why the boys want you to shower before sex…

It doesn’t matter if you showered a few hours before going home with a boy for sex. He will still want you to shower again. According to a farang friend of mine, our body odor is distinctly different from Thai. While the boys absolutely love having sex with us, they really don’t care for the way we smell. For many Thai boys it can actually be a turn off.

My farang friend was a bit apprehensive to explain this, because he felt it sounded too racially prejudice, but the fact is there are physiological differences between races, so it is plausible our body odor may be different. Armed with this information, I decided to poke around the Internet and see what I could find on the subject. As it turns out Asians produce little or no body odor, because they do not have as many odor producing glands as we westerners. I was also able to confirm that different races smell different. So what I’ve determined is our body odor is both different and much more intense. Frankly, I can’t recall ever smelling body odor on a Thai, under any circumstance, and now I know why.

My friend also told me he had read some place that Asians have an acute sense of smell, making strong unpleasant odors even more repugnant, but I’ve not been able to find any reference to this on the Internet.

A quote from American Renaissance News: Race And Physical Differences

For whatever reasons, the races do not smell the same. Blacks and whites have strong, but differing smells, and many Asians have scarcely any smell. Koreans often have no odor-producing glands in their arm-pits at all and Japanese have very few. Nineteenth-century Japanese found Europeans so foul-smelling that even today, a common Japanese expression for anything Western means “stinking of butter.”

A quote from Science Digest: Racial Odyssey

As any bloodhound knows, every person has his or her own distinctive scent. People vary in the mixture of odoriferous compounds exuded through the skin - most of it coming from specialized glands called apocrine glands. Among whites, these are concentrated in the armpits and near the genitals and anus. Among blacks, they may also be found on the chest and abdomen. Orientals have hardly any apocrine glands at all. In the words of the Oxford biologist John R. Baker, “The Europids and Negrids are smelly, the Mongoloids scarcely or not at all.” Smelliest of all are northern European, or so-called Nordic, whites. Body odor is rare in Japan. It was once thought to indicate a European in the ancestry and to be a disease requiring hospitalization.

And this quote from a page on Anosmia and Olfactory Facts

How we smell as individuals is determined by the number of sweat glands, the amount of body hair, diet, health, occupation, environment, medication, emotional health, mood, and genes. Also, blacks, whites, and Asians all have different immune-system proteins and this is one theory for why people of different races smell different. East Asians used to say that whites stank of butter (the butter smell arises from diacetyl-a very small molecule with two ketone groups; westerners tend to consume more butter and other dairy products than Asians). Meat-eaters often smell unpleasant to vegetarians. Hairy Westerners often smell unpleasant to Asians, who don’t have as many apocrine glands at the base of hair follicles as Westerners. Children smell different from adults, smokers smell different from nonsmokers.

With this understanding, the obvious question is why do the boys also want to shower. Well, if for no other reason, it’s to wash off all the skin lotions and baby powder they cover themselves with. That, and bottoms like to give themselves an enema before sex.

My conclusion from all of this is your chances for really good sex go way down when you elect to forego the shower.

Photo Courtesy of Asia Boy

Why the boys want you to shower first…

I’ve always wondered why the boys insist I shower first. I wasn’t sure if it was a courteous gesture of respect, or the boy had an ulterior motive to rifle through my things (wallet) while I’m in the bathroom, and he can hear when the water shuts off. I assumed it might be a little of each, depending on the boy. Now I know the real reason why.

According to a farang friend of mine, this is a cultural carryover from the traditional method Thais use to bathe. Traditional Thai bathing, still widely practiced today, involves standing in a large plastic tub to catch the water being scooped from an even larger tub and pored over the body. The tub catching the “dirty” water is not emptied between baths. Instead, everyone in the home takes their turn before the tub is carried out and dumped by two people. Thus, the first person to bathe is the only one that does not have to stand in dirty water produced by the others that have already bathed. To offer someone the first bath is a courteous and/or respectful gesture, even if bathing is to be done in a modern shower with floor drain. Therefore, it should be no surprise when the boy offers you first bath. He’s just being polite. Of course, he might also have plans to go through your wallet, so don’t let your guard down.

Photo Courtesy of Asia Boy

This is a little experiment a friend has been encouraging me to do. I’m going to make a statement below, and let readers comment on it. I realize it’s a very general statement, but it will be fun to see what others have to say.

I’ve recently gotten quite an education about massage places in Thailand, and decided to dedicate a page to that subject. Most notable is the section of dirty massages, something I had no idea existed.

Photo Courtesy of Bonny Massage

Read New Massage Places Page

Thai English page updates:

Drop – as a result of direct translation, means either drop or fall. If concerned about falling out of bed, a boy will say drop, not fall.

Holiday – means holiday or any scheduled day(s) off from work or school.

Casino – is what boys will say when they really mean to say gamble or gambling.

Air Con - Air Conditioner

Freshy, from the word fresh, typically means young or new. For example, a boy might refer to a younger male farang (late teens – early twenties) as “Freshy Boy”. As apposed to Freshmen, first year university students are called Freshy. I also saw it used as a product name for an item in the grocery, but I’m not sure exactly how that translates. I’m guessing there is more to this I’ve not yet discovered.

Photo Courtesy of Private Boy Movie

I’ve also added a new page about buying clothes that will no doubt expand as I discover more. Reader contributions are strongly encouraged!

You know, I had enough problems trying to understand the hugely popular fashion trend of wearing orthodontic braces. It’s so trendy, there’s even a market for fake braces.

Photo Courtesy of Private Boy Movie

Now I hear fake eye glasses are considered stylish, and apparently not just in Thailand. But you can’t be out on the town wearing any old style. From what I’ve gathered, they need to be thick framed and low profile, much like these pictured below.

Once aware of this I started noticing them on a lot of boys, particularly in the Thai 4 Thai discos. They do seem to be an accessory of choice for evening attire. I find it interesting that the two kisses of death for a young virile man, wanting look his best, are now the must have in fashion for the younger set….go figure.

I’ve just added a new page I promised one reader I’d write. It talks about how I accidentally discovered letting the boys use my spare computer has turned into a real Boy Magnet.

Photo Courtesy of Private Boy Movie

READ THE BOY MAGNET

I’ve just added a new page that lists some products available in Thailand I’ve found useful in keeping those nasty little pests from invading your home.

First of all, I’m not suggesting you try and get these without a prescription. That said, prescription or not, if you are paying any more than 500 baht for 4 100mg tablets of Viagra/Kamagra you’re paying too much. There are a lot of rip off places that try and get 2000 baht, and often times its fake.

While most Thais don’t go into detail about what it is they are doing in the toilet, specifics do occasionally come up in conversation. The majority of boys do not know any English words for either. Of those that do, most only know how to communicate about peeing, and by my observation always say pee pee. In Thai, the most commonly used phrase for peeing is Ching Chong, a playful euphemism that I believe means “shooting a rabbit”, but don’t quote me on this.

Photo Courtesy of Private Boy Movie

More difficult for the boys is communication about going number 2. It is rare, but some boys know to say shit, and I encountered one that would say he has to go brown. I’ve also heard poo poo from a few boys, but most simply don’t know how to say anything you would recognize in English. Interestingly enough, one of the Thai words for shit is wayne. I have a friend who, shortly after moving to Thailand, started using his middle name, because most Thais simply could not deal with calling him by his first name Wayne.