First of all, I don’t advise doing this if you are new to Thailand, as it takes time to develop a sense for determining who the good boys are.  The other thing I want to stress is this isn’t a way to get free sex, but it is a good way to develop friendships and respect from the boys.  The respect comes from doing something nice for the boys that does not involve sex.

Photo Courtesy of Asia Boy

When I first came to Thailand I brought a notebook computer with me.  Later I purchased a desk top that I use all of the time.  I then got the idea to put the notebook out on my coffee table, so I could surf Gay Romeo while watching TV.  It also came in handy for English/Thai translations when I had a boy over for the evening.

I soon discovered some of the boys had an interest in using the computer while they were here.  A lot of them liked the computer so much they were in no hurry to leave.  I’d bring a boy home for short-time sex and he’d end up leaving around 5 or 6 pm the next day, just in time to go back to work at his bar.  I concluded from all this the boys loved lounging around on the sofa while surfing the Internet and watching cartoons on TV.  I’ve had the opportunity to visit a couple of boy’s rooms, often shared with between 1 and 5 other boys.  By comparison, hanging out at my place is pure luxury.

Over time, I began to realize this was a perk the boys did not enjoy with other customers.  Key to this was keeping the sex separate from the time in front of the computer.  In other words, I never try to fool around with the boy while he is at the computer.  To do this would send a message to the boy I’m not being sincere with my generosity.

Once I discovered all this, I got more proactive in seeking out those that would be given the privilege of hanging out and using the computer.  It isn’t something all the boys get to do.  Only the really good boys, that I enjoy being around are allowed.

Basically you want to determine, over whatever length of time it takes, if the boy is good and trustworthy.  You also want to establish if he has an interest in using the computer and understands how to use it without abusing it.  Of course, all of this parallels your determining if you even like the boy and want him around - sex or no sex.  Assuming this all plays out to your satisfaction the fun can begin.

Photo Courtesy of Asia Boy

Every boy and situation is different, but these are some typical scenarios.

I’ll off one of these trusted boys for short time and tell him he’s welcome to spend the night if he wants to play with the computer the next day.  If I really trust the boy I’ll even let him stay up and use the computer while I sleep in the other room.  The boys love this, because they typically don’t go to sleep until around 6 or 7 in the morning.  By the time I wake up, the boy is usually sound asleep on the couch.  The boys usually wake up around noon, go get me something to eat, and get back on the computer until its time to leave for work in their bar.

Photo Courtesy of Asia Boy

I like to watch the parade of boys in Soi Twilight, when all the bars close.  A lot of times boys I know will stop and visit with me.  If he is a boy I really trust I’ll often invite him to come home with me, but just for playing on the computer, no sex and no money.  More often than not the boy will accept.  The important thing is that I stick to my end of the deal and not try and have sex with the boy.  I’ll usually give him two or three hundred baht before he leaves, and it pretty much guarantees hell want to come back any time I make the offer.  This is important, because most boys expect to be paid the standard rate, even if they don’t have sex with the customer.  The customer has taken the boy out of circulation, and therefore must pay for his time.  On the flip side, many of these boys spend their after hours at an Internet cafe.  When given the option of paying to use the Internet at a café all night, or hanging out at my place, the choice  is pretty much a no brainer.

I know several boys that no longer live in Bangkok, but occasionally travel in from their home town.  Their hope is to meet a few customers, make some money and go back home.  As long as they call in advance and get permission, I’ll usually let them stay with me.  It is important to nail down how long the boy plans to stay, and hold him to that, or you might end up with an unexpected room mate.  If the boy doesn’t want to give you a departure date, you need to tell him what it will be.

Sometimes the boy will ask to bring a friend, but he has to promise me his friend is a good boy and won’t steal from me.  I’ve never had a problem with this, and it’s a great way to meet more good boys, as the good boys usually hang out with other good boys.  It’s always great fun to watch two at the computer, in their underwear, helping each other talk to farang.

The visiting boy might also ask to have a friend over that lives in Bangkok.  As long as I’m asked first, and promised he’s a good boy, I’ll usually say yes.  This too is a great way to meet good boys.  However, don’t assume a friend living in BKK is a money boy.  He probably is, but could also be an old high school buddy, and might even be straight.

Sex with the boys that come in from out of town is usually optional, and they are happy with 500 baht.  It’s not lost on them what a good deal they are getting.  How many other farang would let them hang out, and use the computer to look for paying customers?  I could probably get the sex for free, but don’t mind giving them a little cash.  All too often they end up spending some of it on me anyway…typical of the good boys.

Photo Courtesy of Asia Boy

Sex with the boy’s friend may or may not be appropriate, and must be judged on a case by case basis.  This is particularly true if the friend lives in BKK.  If I do end up having sex with the friend from out of town, he too gets 500 baht.  It’s a different story if the friend lives in BKK.

I should point out that a lot of times I won’t have sex with a boy visiting from out of town.  It is very important to send a message that this arrangement is not driven by the opportunity for sex.

Letting the boys stay with me is never a burden, as they keep the house clean, and can get food cheaper, so meals end up costing the same as it would if I were eating on my own.  On top of that, some of the boys are good cooks and love to make dinner for me.

As I am writing this a 20 year old Isan boy is staying with me from out of town.  He’s in from Korat for a week (mid term university break) and hoping to pick up some fast cash before going back to school.

Actually this boy is also here to visit his best friend who’s living with me, but has other places in town he can stay and chooses to hang out at my place.  He first stayed with some Thai friends, and then called to see if he could stay with us.  While the circumstances of my meeting him are different, at this point I have absolutely no doubt he’d be here even if his friend wasn’t.  As it is, the boy living with me is gone most of the day, busy with his university studies.

At this very moment, he’s sound asleep on the couch, all snuggled up in pillows and a light blanket - necessary accessories to complete the package.  Typical of all the boys, he’s in his boxers and a T shirt.  He’ll only put on a pair of pants to go out with me or see a customer - two so far this week.

He rolled in about 10:30 this morning, after seeing a customer last night.  Once stripped down to his boxers, he swept the floors, emptied the trash, and made my bed.  Then he put on a pot of rice and asked me what I’d like to eat for lunch.  After lunch, he washed all of the dishes, and wiped down the counter top and dinning table.  Then his focus shifted to the computer/TV, and he’s been there all afternoon.  I’ve also been informed he’ll be cooking one of his fabulous Isan dinners tonight.

I’m writing about him, because he’s an excellent example of what it’s like when a boy comes to visit from out of town.  I should also mention that the boy living with me full time was previously a frequent out of town visitor, and that evolved into something more permanent.  Having the boys come stay with you like this is a great way to really get to know them without any commitments.  It’s a much better alternative to the three days and they want to be boyfriends scenario, so typical with most boys.

Photo Courtesy of Asia Boy

More About The Computer Setup

I do think it is important that the computer be set up on the coffee table.  To put it over on a desk or table would take away from its being an integrated part of the entertainment package.  The boys love to lounge around on the sofa, snuggled in pillows while watching TV and surfing the Internet.

Photo Courtesy of Asia Boy

My coffee table is a metal frame with glass top and a shelf underneath for magazines.  I’ve put the notebook on the lower shelf and added an external flat panel display, a very small keyboard (with the all important Thai characters), and mouse.  This arrangement minimizes how much of the table top gets taken up by computer, and protects the notebook from accidental drink spills.  I’ve also added a cable lock, so the notebook doesn’t grow legs and walk out the door.  No matter how much you trust these boys, always remember that locks keep honest people honest, and a $1500 computer is a huge temptation for even the best of boys.  The notebook sets on top of a platform with fans to help keep it cool.  They are specially made for notebooks and can be purchased for about 200 baht.  This is particularly important if you don’t use the air conditioner most of the day.

It is important to have a good anti virus, Trojan, and ad ware package running, as the boys tend to wander into areas filled with nasty little things, and aren’t very smart about safe surfing.  I also instruct the boys not to download anything to the computer, install any software, or make any changes to the computer settings.  This is often difficult to communicate when the boy has limited English skills, but you need to give it your best shot.  On top of that they don’t always know when something is actually being downloaded, so periodic house cleaning is a given.  They all seem to like this one chat program.  I can’t remember the exact name, but it has frog in it.  They reason all their friends have it, so it must be safe.  What they don’t know is all their friends also have a bunch of ad ware installed, as a result.  I’ve decided not to do this, but if you really want to be safe, set up a different user login for the computer and configure it to prevent any downloads.  I’ve not done this, because some of the boys have memory sticks they download to, or download directly to their cell phone memory card.  I don’t mind them doing this, because nothing is getting added to the computer’s hard drive.  I’ll give you three guess as to what it is they’re downloading…wink wink.

The boys do like to type in Thai characters, when chatting with their Thai friends, so you need to activate that feature.  I don’t remember exactly how it is done, but it’s not hard and the instructions can be found easily with a few Google searches.  Once activated you can toggle between English and Thai, something all the boys know how to do.

The Internet connection is made using wireless technology, so you will need to buy a wireless router if you don’t already have one.  This may not be an issue if you want to let the boys use your computer, but for a number of good reasons, I don’t recommend it.  You can pick up a used computer at one of many shops in the Pantip Plaza computer mall.  Disk space is not important, but you probably want it configured with a gig of RAM, and wireless capability may need to be added.  It is very important to make sure the keyboard has Thai characters on it.

The boys love it if you have a web cam, but I don’t recommend it.  My notebook has a cam, but now that I’ve moved it to the shelf underneath the table top, it can’t be used.  The biggest problem with a cam is the boys like to use it when chatting with franag on MSN.  A lot of times I’ll sit on the couch and watch TV while the boys are using the computer, and it’s very difficult to stay out of camera view.  On top of that, the camera doesn’t work well in low light, so the boys always want some sort of lamp beaming at their face, a most annoying distraction while trying to watch TV.

Some of the boys think its okay to just turn off the power when shutting down the computer, so you need to spend a little time with them making sure they understand how to properly use the computer.  Most are really good about following instructions, but some need to be told two or three times.

I realize this isn’t for everyone, but I love it.  You really get to know the boys in a way that’s not possible when their visit is based exclusively on sex.  In a lot of ways it’s like having a bunch of boyfriends, but with no commitments….well…sort of.

I can not stress too heavily the importance of properly managing a balance when it comes to having sex with these boys.  They don’t mind the sex, but need to be confident your kind intentions are not driven by a hidden sexual agenda.  If you think about it, that’s true in any culture.  Done properly, the sex just gets better!

This has ended up being a very long page that hopefully covers all the bases, but if you have any questions, feel free to ask.